Real Astrology for Real People

#4 in my sometimes series. See other entries for more stuff about things.

What is Astrology? Ah yes, seeker, you do good to ask. And I'm glad you did, otherwise, why would I write this article? I do have all those episodes of Glee to catch up on, after all. Like all of the earth and sky sciences, the true science of the spirit, mind and the energy that connects us all, Astrology has changed much over the years, adapting to the moving of the planets and the new things they tell us about themselves, and the fact that we keep discovering new planets, which should change everything. But it doesn't. Many naysayers (don’t listen to the jealous ones!) will tell you that you cannot base readings on the positions of planets that aren’t actually where we think they are, the light from the stars having taken thousands of years to reach us. They are fools who don’t understand the science or the skill it take to interpret the signs, houses, charts and stars that make up the ancient art of Astrology. They probably don't even read the chart in TV guide.

The zodiac consists of twelve Sun signs or zodiac signs, each having their own distinct characteristics, because it's always been that way, that's why, stop asking. The Sun’s position in the zodiac is important because it determines the core of one's personality, rather than, say, parents or upbringing, or big brother's who hold you down and dangle lugies over you. The Sun sign represents a person's true colors that are displayed to the world on a daily basis. Use the following guide to determine your general disposition and the core of your personality based on your zodiac sign. But use it carefully, the stars are not toys, and your inner self not always something you might want to know, like how Lost turns out. Oh, you already know? Well then...

If you do go on seeker, good luck to you! If you decide that too much truth is a raw thing you cannot handle, we understand, and also wish good luck to you on your own journey. We hope you find a different path to truth and happiness. MapQuest is often useful, but it insists you always go through downtown. What's up with that?
-------------------
Aries Zodiac Sign
March 21 – April 19
Element: Fire
Quality: Cardinal
Ruling Planet: Mars
Symbol: Ram
Keywords: Assertive, Competitive, Independent, Energetic, Impulsive

Aries people are direct and never shy away from a challenge, unless it's too hard or might cost them some money. This person is excellent at getting things started, however, they sometimes lacks the follow-through to complete projects, much like your brother-in-law. Aries people prefer to lead, rather than being told what to do, but then, who doesn’t. The tendency to be impulsive often prevents this zodiac sign from thinking a situation through before taking action. In a relationship, Aries people love the challenge as well as the chase, and are attracted to people who play hard to get, but then don’t know what to do with them, often taking them to McDonald’s, buying them a cheeseburger and calling that a date. The Aries individual tends to have a sharp temper, however, he or she rarely holds a grudge. At lest, that is what they tell you to your face…

Taurus Zodiac Sign
April 20 - May 20
Element: Earth
Quality: Fixed
Ruling Planet: Venus
Symbol: Bull
Keywords: Stable, Sensual, Determined, Stubborn, Affectionate

The Taurus individual is patient and determined. Generally easygoing, their placid demeanor rarely shows upset or anger. However, when they have been pushed to the limit, provoked or made to pick up a check – watch out! Taurus people are cautious and dislike change, preferring to stick with what is familiar and comfortable, much like your mother when you show her how a cell phone or email will improve her life. There is a tendency to be materialistic and the Taurus person is sometimes too concerned with money and material possessions, unlike the rest of us. The tendency to overindulge and a dislike of exercise often causes the Taurus person to put on weight. In a relationship, Taurus tends to be affectionate and dependable, but fat, grasping and worried about their stuff.

Gemini Zodiac Sign
May 21 - June 21
Element: Air
Quality: Mutable
Ruling Planet: Mercury
Symbol: Twins
Keywords: Communicative, Intelligent, Fickle, Restless, Curious

Communication is important to the Gemini person. Geminis like to talk and talk and talk and the have a quick, curious mind, or so their friends tell you before the blind date. Gemini rules the mind and these people may think too much or over-analyze situations, or not. But probably. The Gemini person enjoys companionship and dislikes being alone, but puts up with it on long car trips. They need constant excitement and stimulation and has a tendency to become bored easily, so bring along plenty of DVDs.

Witty and charming, Geminis make friends easily. Gemini enjoys flirtation and is attracted to people who are interesting and easy to talk to, unlike the rest of us, who put up with boring, uptight people. Mental attraction is extremely important to the Gemini person, but they will take a nice body any day.

Cancer Zodiac Sign
June 22 - July 22
Element: Water
Quality: Cardinal
Ruling Planet: Moon
Symbol: Crab
Keywords: Shy, Cautious, Homebody, Protective, Moody

The Cancer person tends to be extremely protective of his or her own feelings and retreats at the first sign of rejection, which is why they're unmarried at 38. Cancers are attuned to the past and may hold on to feelings and reminders of the past, which prevent them from moving forward in life. They also like scrapbooking, taking these memories of the past and making lovely arrangements of them in large books.

Extremely family-oriented, this zodiac sign feels the most secure when they are surrounded by family and loved ones, except for their Uncle Johnny, whom they’ve never really cared for. The Cancer person also tends to be a homebody, preferring to stay at home and read a book rather than party. Cancers need a partner who is demonstrative and devoted, because no one else would stand them.

Leo Zodiac Sign
July 23 - August 22
Element: Fire
Quality: Fixed
Ruling Planet: Sun
Symbol: Lion
Keywords: Warm, Generous, Ostentatious, Exuberant, Self-Centered

The Leo person is confident and somewhat self-centered, which is nice for them. Leos need adoration and attention and enjoy being in the spotlight. This person has a magnetic personality and a sunny disposition and he or she tends to attract friends easily. Leo thinks they’re all that, but they ain’t.

Leos have a tendency to be dramatic about everything and their emotional displays are often quite impressive. The Leo individual loves to show off and can be somewhat arrogant and they probably strangle babies.Well, they do seem the type. Leos are romantic and need a partner who showers him or her with attention and tokens of love. Sounds needy. And expensive.

Virgo Zodiac Sign
August 23 - September 22
Element: Earth
Quality: Mutable
Ruling Planet: Mercury
Symbol: Virgin
Keywords: Critical, Methodical, Helpful, Modest, Diligent

Virgo possesses a critical, modest nature, thank you very much. The Virgo person is extremely hardworking and conscientious and has a tendency towards perfectionism, which makes them a real pain on team projects. These unassuming people are content to live in the background and may prefer a job where they work in a behind-the-scenes capacity, like a puppet master.

They have a tendency to want to “fix” people and are often critical of loved ones, if they have any. There is also a tendency to worry too much and this zodiac sign is prone to stress-related illnesses. The Virgo person expresses affection by doing things for others, rather than actual physical displays of affection. Sounds like a real martyr.

Libra Zodiac Sign
September 23 - October 22
Element: Air
Quality: Cardinal
Ruling Planet: Venus
Symbol: Scales
Keywords: Sociable, Pleasant, Superficial, Fair, Refined

Libras need balance and harmony, which is nice, because their symbol is a scale. See how that works out? The Libra person is extremely sensitive to his or her environment and does not function properly when surrounded by chaos and disorder, like everybody else does. These people are charming and pleasant, and have a strong dislike for confrontation. They can be passive-aggressive, tapping on counters to get people’s attention rather than saying 'excuse me'. This can tick people off.

Libras often refrain from speaking their mind and have a tendency to say what people want to hear in order to avoid conflict. They get in trouble a lot because, well, everyone else was doing it. A dispassionate, detached demeanor is characteristic of this sign. They don’t really seem to care, but they really do. Libra needs a partner who has good manners, good tastes and a romantic nature, instead of the other kind.

Scorpio Zodiac Sign
October 23 - November 21
Element: Water
Quality: Fixed
Ruling Planet: Pluto
Symbol: Scorpion
Keywords: Intense, Focused, Penetrating, Secretive, Possessive

The Scorpio person has a tendency to be possessive and secretive. They would be unhappy we’re talking about them right now. This person is an expert at getting others to reveal their secrets, although he or she rarely opens up to anyone, which can make them a bit of a jerk. Scorpios devote 100% of their energy to everything they do and rarely give up. The Scorpio person is critical and demanding towards loved ones and expects complete loyalty and devotion from a partner, but they get to do what they want.

A lot of energy is focused on the pursuit of sex and power, of course. The Scorpio individual needs a partner who is as passionate and willful as they are and finds it difficult to respect a person who is weak-willed or passive. As everyone else does.

Sagittarius Zodiac Sign
November 22 - December 21
Element: Fire
Quality: Mutable
Ruling Planet: Jupiter
Symbol: Archer
Keywords: Adventurous, Enthusiastic, Freedom-Loving, Outgoing, Spontaneous

Gregarious and enthusiastic, Sagittarius enjoys interacting with people and making friends. Sagittarians do need their freedom, however, which is especially apparent in love relationships, where they expect you be faithful, but they don’t want to be ‘tied down’. There is a tendency to be blunt, which can sometimes come across as rudeness. They also tend to be real jerks, but that might be passed off as ‘just being themselves’.

Their blunt nature does not come from malice or spite, however; this person simply has a strong need to tell it like it is. Sagittarius needs a partner who is as fun-loving and adventurous as he or she is, and who can take a blunt answer to the question, ‘does this make me look fat?’

Capricorn Zodiac Sign
December 22 - January 19
Element: Earth
Quality: Cardinal
Ruling Planet: Saturn
Symbol: Sea Goat
Keywords: Serious, Cautious, Ambitious, Disciplined, Conservative

Capricorns have a serious, cautious nature. The Capricorn person is aloof and detached and may have difficulty opening up to others, which makes us wonder how they get dates. These people are ambitious and status-conscious and they tend to devote a lot of energy to their career. They are terrible to have lunch with as they mutter and look at their phones the whole time. They are little fun at parties, always trying to be better than everyone else. They also get robbed by having birthdays too close to Christmas. Probably a lot of serial killer here.

Capricorns have a tendency to choose friends and partners based on status or material wealth rather than compatibility, which means the biggest TV really does win. Once the Capricorn person does open up to someone, he or she is extremely loyal and devoted. The Capricorn person is attracted to people who are mature and goal-oriented. And have lots of money. But who isn’t?

Aquarius Zodiac Sign
January 20 - February 18
Element: Air
Quality: Fixed
Ruling Planet: Uranus
Symbol: Waterbearer
Keywords: Eccentric, Intellectual, Aloof, Progressive, Friendly

Unconventional and outspoken, Aquarius is the rebel of the zodiac, like Fonzie, the bad boy (or girl) that you know is wrong for you, but that you just know you can tame. Of course, who wants a tame bad boy? Aquarians tend to be eccentric in their speech and behavior, often drawing attention to themselves, making people ask ‘who invited them?’ Equality, freedom and fairness are important to this individual and he or she has a genuine interest in humankind, which is good, being a part of it and all. An aloof and detached nature is characteristic of this sign and he or she feels most comfortable relating to people on a mental level, which is not nearly as fun a level as it sounds. Aquarius needs a partner who is his or her intellectual equal and who is willing to provide freedom and space. And put up with their weird crap.

Pisces Zodiac Sign
February 19 - March 20
Element: Water
Quality: Mutable
Ruling Planet: Neptune
Symbol: Fish
Keywords: Sensitive, Romantic, Gullible, Idealistic, Compassionate

Pisces people tend to be dreamers and often fail to see reality, never live up to their potential, they tend to be bachelor uncles a lot, or little bothers. Self-confidence may be lacking in this individual and he or she may suffer from an inferiority complex, or may really just be inferior. Pisces individuals are extremely receptive and can sense the feelings of those around them. they can probably sense what we're thinking right now... Pisceans are considered the psychic sponge of the zodiac, picking up on and assimilating the feelings and emotions of others. For this reason, he or she tends to be moody, kinda stand-offish with the hair-in-their-eyes thing. And maybe a hoodie. And who wouldn’t be, picking up all the emotional energy of those around them? Probably gets a lot of migraines too. This zodiac sign is extremely kind hearted and tolerant of others. The Pisces person is attracted to a partner who is romantic, sensitive and gentle. I do see no one seems to be attracted to utter jerks. I wonder how they keep multiplying?

---------------------------

The influence of the Sun is an important factor in astrology and zodiac signs because its placement determines a person’s core personality and basic demeanor, again, not at all like those parents, siblings or upbringing. Studying the Sun’s influence can provide clues to a person’s true nature. Of course, you could just ask them ‘what is your true nature?’, but they wouldn’t tell you, would they? The rising sign and other zodiac planets in an astrology chart alter the Sun sign characteristics slightly, so take these factors into consideration when studying the influence of the Sun. And don’t stare directly into it.

This is only a small window on the fantastic world that is the worlds of Astrology, the natural science of the planet, the stars and of your soul. Use it with care, practice it with utmost fidelity, and treat it as the fine art it is, not as a knife to stab out at enemies and non-believers.

Remember, if you see contradictions in each of these sign descriptions, it is only the raw stuff that adds to the richness of the reading, making it conform to the contradictions of the human personality and soul